essence de moi

A tribute

2009-12-07T06:22:13Z

I was reading my old blog and came across this entry i posted up 5 years back, thought that I'd share it again here.

This is a tribute to the nice guys.
The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honour of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honour of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honour of the guys who respect a girls every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once theyre at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow dont end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldnt worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didnt have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh, but were just friends! And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you're nice like that.

The nice guys dont often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys dont seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I cant. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as oh, hes too nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but hes not for me or he already puts up with so much from me, I couldnt possibly ask him out! or the most frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our friendship. Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I cant figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (Im going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesnt last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know youre sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

November Rain

2009-11-15T11:53:18Z

Its been awhile hasnt it? Two whole months!
*blows dust off blog*
I've been busy with work and have been uninspired to blog. I wonder where my passion for blogging went. I gotta say I miss my angsty blogspot days. Sometimes I have an urge to restart this LJ of mine but then the history, the words, the emotions that is in this blog is part of me and it reminds me of who i am and how far I've come. In simpler terms I am loyal when I commit myself to something, same goes for people i guess.

Alot of things has passed by these past two months: (in no particular order)

1. The one year anniversary of my open heart surgery ergo the anniversary of the metal thingy in my heart that helps pump blood through my system;

2. Standing in the front row of Backstreet Boys' 2hrs mini concert at the Padang after the F1 race. Screaming and singing my head off! Best day ever! Firstly bcoz i almost didnt go coz i inititaly didnt have a ticket and secondly... they were my idols eversince i was 12! Now 13 years later they are still around as awesome as ever ;

3. My first stint as a freelance amateur photographer for my close friend sister's engagement ceremony;

4. Eid or better known as Hari Raya Puasa;

5. Endless paperwork for hearing, trials and the usual stuff you see in a law firm;

6. The annual TP Law Alumni Reunion;

7. Arashi's 10th year anniversary;

8. signing up for gym membership bcoz i realised tt i'm turning 25 in 8 days and i need to get healthy and strengthen my lower back and heart muscles before its too late;

9. Getting high fever and ordered by the doctor to rest for a week at home for suspected H1N1 which ends today; oh and

10. Just realised tt i'm turning a quarter of a decade old and still have no idea where my life is headed to, if i'm making the right decisions in life and if i'm going end up an old maid till my heart call it quits. LOL.

see how relatively boring my life is?

I had actually started this Post yesterday, got distracted, did laundry, did part of my Tokyo trip research, fell asleep on the living room couch, woke up had breakfast, watched Push & Forest Gump and Sunday afternoon has moved into twilight.

Sometimes i wonder what it is like to live a life without worry. Without worrying that you might not have enough money to get to your next pay day, without worrying that you might not have enough money to buy lunch for the week or without worrying that you might not have enough money to pay the bills. Sometimes i envy people who are comfortable. Comfortable enough to splurge without caring, comfortable enough to not even think twice where the money they spend comes from and comfortable enough to not think twice about spending money on the school of their choice and not compromise and give up a spot in a school of their choosing because of the lack of what makes the world go round, money.

Some people ask why my salary range is not as high as it should be and I always tell them I don't mind. I don't mind when I enjoy my work. Sure it would help alot if my salary is higher but i guess the salary range comes with experience. I have been away from the legal industry for a relatively long time due to my decision to pursue what I wanted at that time, but circumstance and maybe fate led me back to the legal industry and its kinda like starting over. I still have loads to learn. I've always believed in the phrase 'work like you don't need the money' coz that way you enjoy what you do and believe me, i do. I wonder why my salary range is so important to some people, tho I don't tell them how much exactly I earn just only that I earn lower than most of them. But who cares? I don't. I aim to be the best legal support staff i can be, and no i have no intention of ever becoming a lawyer but I know that my work do help people in ways they can never see. I still miss events management tho :P Maybe I’ll get back to that in the future, who knows? *grinz*

My Tokyo trip is in 37 days, it wld have been in 7 days if I had my way and celebrating my 25th birthday in Tokyo but my savings will only allow me to go in December. Just to have enough money for a trip I usually need at least 6-7 months to save up. I am not as fortunate like some people who can make impromptu overseas trips but that would so be a dream of mine in the future. Travelling makes me feel free. Somehow it recharges my system and makes me happy.

There are 5 things that make me happy (in no particular order)
1- Travelling
2- Taking photographs
3- Hanging out with friends
4- My family; and
5- Arashi

I wish the number 3 thing was a frequent thing tho. Whenever I meet up with friends I feel my weariness slither away. I love my friends but sadly we hardly see each other anymore. Everyone seem to be too busy with their own lives. Building a career seems to matter much more. I wonder where the good ol’ days we had in school went. Oh well as long as everyone is happy right?

I know most of my friends don’t understand my number 5 thing. The thing is that for me Arashi provides a bandage over my empty heart. They make me smile when I feel down and their songs lifts my spirit up. Bottomline is they make me happy. It doesn’t matter if you don’t get it. I do me and you do you ok.

Anyhoo
1 more week to my 25th birthday
1 more month to my Tokyo trip
I am contented with my life tho I may not know what the future holds for me I am hopeful and I have faith. I am thankful that I’m still alive and I know things happen for a reason.
People tell me that I will find something during my Tokyo trip and I hope they are right.
Speaking of which I am not done yet with my itinerary. But I plan to go with the flow and not be rigid with it. I can always go back for a short trip if it is within means.

Well before I end off this entry I’d like to share a video.
The song is originally Daughtry’s but whenever these Irish boys sing they always pull at my heart strings. Enjoy!

wheee....

2009-09-14T13:32:10Z

So.. I started drafting an entry this morning, and well its evening now and I have not even completed that draft. LOL.
I'm no longer inspired to blog these days. My life revolves around work just the way i like it so my life ain't that interesting to begin with :P
I tweet more nowadays just because its convenient and its convenient to do so with my blackberry storm :P

Oh yes i got meself a new phone! Its a month old now so kinda an old update hehe but i've been eyeing this phone eversince it first got announced and well the name of the phone helps as well, storm = arashi. LOLOLOL!

My baby. Of course my wallpaper has to be my favourite boys ;)

Today has been a slow day. I didn't go to work today because of the thing called the cramps. I hate cramps, it feels like a bulldozer ran over my stomach. I don't usually get the cramps but the fasting month always makes my system go out of whack especially now since i'm taking meds for me heart. bleah.

Eid is fast approaching, not that i'm looking forward to it. It'll be the same as every year me thinks. The only thing difference between last year's and this year is that i won't be in the ICU recovering from heart surgery hurhur. What i'm looking forward to more than anything else is my trip to Tokyo in December. 3 more months baby! I am so excited. I hope my monthly savings will be able to cover my whole trip. It ain't exactly a breeze having to save up almost half of my salary each month for the trip but i'm sure it'll be worth it. Experience vs Material things, i very much rather have the former. Material things don't last but memories are precious and part of who you are as a person. Well at least that is what i think.

Saturday with my favourite girls was awesome. Met up with ifah, aida and her hubby for our 'breaking fast picnic' @ Class 95's Movies in the Park. The place was packed when we arrived! and it was only about 6.20pm. We were able to get a spot near the tents but unfortunately we were seated near the public footpath so throughout the first movie, Iron Man, there was a constant stream of people walking up and down the footpath. They were either people who couldn't sit still or came late for the movie. Thank god when it came to the 2nd movie most ppl who brought their young kids started making their way home mainly bcoz i guess their kids were tired. We were able to move towards the center of the viewing area for Transformers: Revenge of the fallen and our new spot was fantastic! Will definitely look forward to the next Movies in the Park. Kudos to Class95 for the awesome event (^-^)b

Heard the buzz about the VMA's today? Well particularly about Kanye West's stunt. He should have not interrupted Taylor Swift's moment on stage when she won the Best Female Video Award. I'm not a huge fan of hers but she did work hard and totally deserved the award. Kanye is simply put an immature egotistical prat. Beyonce is one classy awesome lady when she gave Taylor her moment after she won Video of the Year award. I have new found respect for Beyonce (^-')b

If you have no clue what i'm talking about, here are the videos if you're interested:

Last but not least HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my darling sis Asyhhie!!!
*throws confetti*
All the best in your future endeavors! Best wishes and God Bless!
I love you sis *hugs*

I'm gonna dedicate this video i'm going to share with you guys to my darling sis. We are HUGE Josh Groban fans and I love this performance Josh did on Oprah. enjoy!

Savannah is one lucky girl aint she? sighs. :)

Lust ♥

2009-08-15T20:10:44Z

Its the wee hours of Sunday morning and I have yet to sleep a wink.
What have I been doing besides needing to sleep badly? I've been looking up on camera lenses anddd I'm currently lusting over this:

Its the Nikkor AF-S DX VR18-200mm f/3.5-5.6G IF-ED DSLR Lens ♥♥♥

This is so gonna burn a whole in my pocket if I ever want to get this baby. Maybe I'll start saving up after my Japan trip or maybe boss will be generous next year and we'll get a bonus! bonus = moolah to buy new lens! :)

I wouldn't mind this as a birthday present either LOL. Its ok if I just get this one thing from let say a hundred people pooling funds together. Each person can contribute hmm according to my calculations minimum abt S$10 each? or i wouldn't mind not getting 5 years worth of presents for this one thing ROFL.
Yes keep dreaming azi :P

quickie

2009-08-14T17:58:30Z

Sigh sometimes i think i'm a walking a contradiction. I don't listen to my own advice.
I blame my previous entry on PMS.
Remind me never to blog when i'm having one of those days LOL!
I was re-reading my past entries and omg how i cringe at some of them. No more talk about this crazy thing called love well in my case the lack thereof. I'll only do so when i actually do fall in love, till then somebody please slap me if i ever do it again. I shall gather more experience before expressing my views on it any further than I already have. Mr Cupid hit me with your best shot LOL :P

Anyhoo thank you mx (muted_orison ) and lia (mklia )for your comments. *hugs*
I will keep your advices in mind and for future reference :)

Yay its the weekend! It has been a hectic week, at least for me. Don't you just love it when dozens of deadlines seem to fall all around the same time? wheee... Well time to rest, catch up on sleep and do nothing. But then again i brought work home. Stuff to draft for an upcoming trial and I have yet to get started on my Japanese homework ehehehehe

Righto I have more to blog about but I'm tired and need sleep
Apologies for this pointless entry, I had actually typed out a long one but LJ & the WWW has been bitchy and erased my unsaved entry *bluek*

I've uploaded some photos I took at darling aida's wedding on facebook here
Those are only the solemnnization ceremony. I have yet to upload the wedding reception (majlis persandingan - is that how it's spelled?lol) photos.
Not all of the photos I took of the two days will be uploaded, only a selected few coz 1 - with the sucky internet connection these past few days I'm lucky to even upload some of them after several tries and 2 - I've too many photos and uploading them all will bore you with repetitions hurhur. Will upload the 2nd day photos soon.

Till then me darlings.
おやすみなさい :)

The trouble with love is...

2009-08-10T17:16:56Z

I don't think I know anything about love. I may somewhat have become a pessimist.
Everytime i feel it, its' gone, it disappears, and all that i have left is the void of what it would have been.
So now maybe I'm afraid to love, afraid that the little flutter in my heart is a potential heartbreak.
I know that nothing in life is certain, but I'm afraid.
Afraid to make the first move. Afraid to take a chance to what may or may not be.
Afraid that what ever baggage that I bring along with me will be too heavy for the other person and i'll just end up being alone
and if that is so wouldn't being alone in the first place be better then ever getting hurt or hurting somebody?

Sometimes I think i'm just in love with the idea of being in love. Sometimes I wonder how wonderful it would be to be in love. But I've always been unlucky in finding love. I'm turning 25 and have yet to fall in love, to experience what that really feels like. But I'm my own worst enemy. When there is any hint of possibilites i push it away, i deny and pretend that i have no feelings whatsoever. Then I'll go home and mull over it, wallow in regret and then I think of all the things why someone could never really love me and the things that I can't offer so I let everything slide, smile and pretend that everything is as it should be.

Sometimes I wish there was someone out there who can show me how wrong I am, someone who wouldn't care that i'm not perfect and who would accept my imperfections, someone who is not afraid to come up to me just to say "hello" instead of thinking how tall and initmidating i look. Maybe i'm asking for too much. Working on divorce cases at work on a weekly basis sure does not help things aye? haha. Sometimes I do want to believe that there is really someone out there for everyone but is there really one out there for me?

But I do have friends who give me hope. I look at Tania & DS, their relationship, how they give and take, how they have grown stronger as a couple through their ups and downs. Then there's Aida & Wan. all the obstacles they went through in their relationship, proving all those who didn't believe in their relationship wrong, and now married, spending their life together in 'holy matrimony'.

So maybe i shall be a little bit more optimistic, and maybe I shouldn't dwell on such stupidity like love. If its meant to be its meant to be right? I believe in fate and that things happen for a reason and on its own time, i guess I should have a little more faith. Haiz all this talk about love, i swear I think i'm getting old. Holding babies doesn't help either since I can't have one of my own. Now that is another topic altogether LOL!

Moving along, the weekend has been exhausting. I've never been involved in two full days of malay wedding activities. It was definintely an eye opener. Ok i teared up abit during the wedding which i never did expect to. Its kinda bittersweet to see your best friend getting married. I'm so happy for the newlyweds, darling Aida and Wan. I wish both of them the all the love & happiness in the world and the v.best in their future endeavors as a couple and as seperate individuals.

Oh one more thing i learn from this wedding, I will never have mine (If i do ever get married in the far farr future) at the void deck. The heat and humidity! Which brings me to a whole big argument about the sense of having a void deck wedding but then that is a whole different topic altogether which i'm sure will elongate this entry and bore you further ahahaha.

Anyhoo back to the wedding, I have yet to upload all the photos i took during the 2 days but here's a preview :)

randomness

2009-08-02T16:21:07Z

The weekend is ending and i can already forsee a v.busy week ahead. Despite the 'long' weekend next week, it'll be darling aida's big day! So many people getting married it seems. Tho at times when tiny negative thoughts decides to catch me off guard, i end up feeling lonely for myself. Don't get me wrong tho, i can't forsee seeing myself getting married anytime soon (if there is even tt remote possibility in the future), i'm perfectly happy being single since i still have a lot of things in life i want to do first, then there's also the having to find a life partner first ahaha! But I think its nice to actually have someone to be there for you. Someone who can actually fill your empty heart with a little warmth, tho i keep telling myself i'm not lonely. Who am I kidding but ah well who cares really. So long as I keep doing my best in my work and continue smiling, nothing can bring me down. gambarimasu!

*an hour later*
lol i left this post hanging and now i have no idea what to continue with :P
hmm since we were on the topic of aida's wedding. I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!!
When was the last time i went to a 'traditional' malay void deck wedding? hmmmz *scratches head* I think it was noreen's a couple of years back. That one also i didnt wear a 'baju kurung'. haizhaiz i need to go to geylang to get one this week. Then most probably it wld also double as my raya outfit this year. Now the question is... 'Can I find someting that will fit me????' sigh the disadvantages of being tall in an asian country.
Next problem, I have no shoes either to go with my non-existant 'baju kurung'. The only heels that i have tt might do the job is my 3 year old brown wedges tt has been collecting dust in the shoe cupboard. Ah yes i don't wear much heels. Its uncomfortable, v.difficult to find my size andd i'll get even more stared at if i wear em'. hmmz.
Ask me again why do I live in Singapore? bluek.

Quick Update

2009-07-25T15:49:59Z

I’ve been relatively busy with work. It’s been quite an exhausting couple of weeks considering one of my colleagues being on a month’s leave and having to cope w/ one man down. It’s certainly been an experience and I ain’t complaining since I do enjoy my work. It’s all about time management me thinks. And it certainly helps that at certain times of the day I have random Arashi songs in my head playing in loops. Don't ask me why but it kinda makes my day bearable. Hopefully till she’s back I won’t run out of gas and fall ill or something *cross fingers*

Therefore I’m making full use of this weekend to rest up and stay at home coz I foresee a very busy few weeks ahead. (Aida’s wedding in 2 weeks!)

In other news, My Tokyo trip in December is confirmed!! It’s going to be a solo trip this time since I couldn’t find anyone interested to go with me. Both me flights and accommodation are already booked!

Thank god I booked flights when I did. Malaysian Airlines is currently having a promo till the end of July and S$399 to Tokyo is meccha cheap! I had intended to book my flight the week before on a Thursday after having gathered opinions from my family and friends and then I realized I had not renewed my Passport yet! So I quickly went online to the ICA website and applied for my new passport online. The convenience of the WWW. Suki! Got a notification on a Saturday morning that I could collect it on Tuesday onwards and I quickly arranged for an e-appointment to collect it during lunchtime. Unlike previously when you had to wait for hours to collect your passport at the ICA, I had just collected my queue number and was just about to sit down at the waiting area when my number got called! So fast! The ICA officer was a malay lady and she was super duper friendly. She was going on and on about her childhood days and the solar eclipse. All I could do was smile and nod in agreement ^-^” lol!

The same evening I decided to book my flight tix lest it gets sold out. Originally I had intended to fly off on 23 Dec however the evening flight that I wanted was fully booked so instead of taking the morning flight which means I’ll arrive in Tokyo in the late afternoon, wasting a day in Tokyo, I decided to take an extra day leave and pick the evening flight a day earlier. Emailed the inn I’m booked at to extend my reservation period to 10 nights and I proceeded to book my flight tix! Now that I have the 2 most important things confirmed, next thing to do is lay out my itinerary and continue saving up for my trip! So exciting! Xmas and New Years in Tokyo! I kinda know where I want to go and stuff, but I’m still reading forums and reviews of folks who have been there. Free and Easy Do It Yourself trips are fun! Don’t you think so? Yes I’m the kind of person who likes to plan. (^-^)v

Well hopefully I get to meet awesome people on my trip. I’m calling this my “self discovery & photography trip” hehe..

I have more to blog about but I’m exhausted and my eyes lids are getting heavy. Till next post me darlings, have a great weekend! Well what's left of it anyways (^-^)b

Gone to soon...

2009-06-27T08:54:13Z

In memory of 3 great celebrity icons

Warning: Meccha Long Entry

2009-06-11T07:21:57Z

Found myself locked out of the office for the second time in 2 weeks. I’m one out of the two legal staff who usually comes in early and since the receptionist who usually starts work at about 7.30/8.00 am is on leave till the end of the week and big boss who is always early decided to come in later, there was no one to unlock the doors. So my fellow colleague and I had to wait outside the office doors for about 20 minutes before someone came to unlock the door. They should seriously consider giving one of us a copy of the office key lest this happens again.

It’s been quite awhile since I last blogged. Mainly because I have been pretty busy with work, and when I actually do have something to update about I’ll lose the urge to. I’ll just stare at the ‘post new entry’ screen and after a few minutes trying to put my thoughts into words, I’ll close the window. LOL. Which is why I have twitter for moments like those. Haha.

Can you believe it? We are almost in mid-June! Wow half a year went by so fast! How has your 2009 been so far? Mine has been going awesome, and if you aren’t as enthusiastic as I am, don’t worry things will get better. Gambare! Like a wise person once said, “How your life is currently is exactly the way you want it to be.”

Anyways have I ever mentioned about my fear of riding on a motorbike? Which is one of the reasons why I have never ridden on one, even if it is on my brother’s. Well on Monday I conquered that fear! Woot!

-Sho being happy for me LOL-

Ok-lah I only conquered it because I had overslept, was extremely late for work and as luck would have it my 3rd brother was on leave! So I asked him to give me a ride to work. I was nervous but I don’t like to be late for work so I didn’t let the fear get to me. Oh boy was that an experience.

For the first half of the journey I had my eyes half closed and was praying for the ride to be a smooth one. By the second half of the journey I was less nervous, had my eyes open but still praying lol. Well all in all I think I still prefer the safety of being in a car, being a pillion you have to have absolute trust in the rider lest he’ll take unnecessary risks or speeds up like there’s a demon on his tail and I don’t like how I had to breathe in all the fumes and carbon monoxide on the road. :P

I guess now I won’t be so afraid to hitch a ride on my brother’s bike but I still would consider taking public transportation first before I’ll ever consider my 2nd ride(^-^)v

Oh and speaking of which, on the said Monday was my brother’s 21st birthday no less. LOL! Happy Belated Birthday bro!

(Just for future reference for those who are confused when I’m referring to a particular sibling I’ll mention them in the order they are born in, i.e asyhhieis my 2nd sister since she is the 2nd in the family and so on, get the drift?)
.
Speaking of which, I finally signed up for Japanese language classes at my neighbourhood CC last week with my 4th Brother! My brother was looking through the latest Tampines Central CC flyer and saw that they were offering Japanese Elementary 1 at the end of this month and since he was interested and would only sign up if there is someone who would join with him, I told myself 'why not' since I’ve been itching to sign up at Ikoma but never got around to doing so and had ended up studying on my own hahaha
Yay i'm excited!

Sashi’s farewell party was held last Friday @ ECP, kindly organized by Kay. I decided to bake brownies coz that seemed to be the easiest thing to bake on a work-night. Although I did not know about ¾ of the people who attended, I had fun! I enjoy meeting new people, tho I might be shy/awkward at first ehehe (^-‘)v Met a number of awesome people and they certainly left an impression on me. All good I assure you. There were too many names to remember but the ones I do; Michelle, Priscilla, Johanna, Sam (I think there are 2 of you), Ken & Kewal oh and who can forget the adorable LJ! If any of you are reading this, Hello! *waves* Hopefully we’ll meet up again soon!

I was talking to the guys that night and I kinda realise something, and mind you this is totally random. I think if I ever in the near or distant future do eventually start dating (this is of course if guys stop getting intimidated by me, I am really nice, honest! lol), I would prefer if the guy have somewhat similar interest in food as me hahaha! I don’t care if their interest lies in other things, I can always learn to like it or understand it, but when it comes to food, I prefer someone who enjoys eating as much as me. For example, I LOVE Japanese food but if the guy hates/dislike it and the only time I can eat it is on my own or with friends who also enjoy eating Japanese food (which is not many) then that is already a minus factor methinks. I don’t care about fine dining or classy places, why fork out money for most likely bad tasting food, tho i don't mind paying if the food is meccha umai! I feel comfortable right smack in the middle of a hawker center as long as I find good food and the venue ain’t too stuffy. So as long as the guy ain’t choosy when it comes to food and enjoy eating as much as I do, so much the better.

Well Kay and the guys (i.e Vik & Co) were asking me on the wee hours of Saturday morning when we were hanging out at a café, what is my type of guy? Thing is I never really answered and they came to a conclusion that it would be a Japanese guy, which is not surprising considering my love for most things Japanese. Best thing is, I never really did say anything except for the tiny fact that I don’t really like malay guys even tho I keep hearing from my non-malay friends that malay guys are usually hot. Got meh? Yes I know I’m very un-malay, I don’t listen to malay songs, I don’t watch Suria channel and I need a translator/dictionary if I discover a ‘cheem’ malay word. Even when I have to talk to a client in malay I would write my sentences on paper first and look up the English-Malay dictionary for words I’m not sure of hahaha A Chinese colleague was telling me something about ‘petai’ and I was like “err what is Petai?” and I was asked if I’m sure I’m malay LOL

Anyways lets not digress to how ‘un-malay’ I am. So what is my type of guy? I never really thought of it and neither do I have a list. I guess so long as the guy doesn’t smoke (unless he slowly wants to give me lung cancer and die faster), enjoys eating, is intelligent, spontaneous, kind hearted and easy going, everything else is secondary. It would be a plus if he looks like any of the Arashi members or Mizushima Hiro!! (I couldn't decide on one) LOL!

I swear I never intended to blog about this when I started this post lol! I’m blaming it on the slow day in the office. Speaking of which a very happy client just brought Nasi Briyani for the whole firm! Yay! Briyani for lunch! The yummy smell is making hungry already hee~

Weekend is approaching fast! It’s another Friday tomorrow! I’m anticipating a busy weekend, all with darling Aida in them. She’s preparing for her wedding photo shoot and we’ll be doing all the ‘girly’ stuff this weekend ahahahaha I’m sure it’s going to be fun!

The PC show 2009 is also happening this weekend and it starts today! Darn I’m tempted to get the Toshiba NB200, so pwetttyy. Love at first sight when I first saw it at Funan! If only it comes in red, but the brown bronzy color is gorgeous as well. I wonder if they have free RAM upgrade, then that will be like cherry on top! I’m already overbudget for the month but we’ll see how everything turns out.

I was watching Arashi’s latest appearance on Utaban a couple of nights ago. Omg Arashi + Japanese comedians = win! And Ohno is so adorable albeit his sunburn haha! Speaking of Ohno I found out that he has the same birthday as my big boss! Oh and have you watched Arashi’s appearance on HEYx3 where they did a survey targeted at various group of people on the streets? Ohno’s expressions = priceless! I think he looked like he was going to cry at one point lol!

See how tanned ohno-kun looked in Utaban, I think he has gotten even more darker in the latest episode of ANS(below).

Not a flattering pic of him i know, but i'm just showing you how burnt Ohno-kun looks now. Its obvious how the make-up artist is trying to cover his sunburn, unsucessfully tho haha. As much as i understand how much he loves fishing, the dark tan is a bit too much no? Has he never heard of sun screen? lol

Anyways I have been thinking quite a bit on my Japan trip, working out the budget / itinerary. Tentatively it looks like it might be a solo one, unless anyone would like to join me. I might be pushing the trip to the end of December, perhaps during Xmas-NewYear week. Hopefully I'll be able to confirm the dates in Jul/Aug. (^-^)b

Righto as I’m drafting this on MS Word, I’m already in the middle of page 3 hurhur. Apologies for the meccha long entry. So many things to update on and now I’ve run out of steam, just in time for Lunch! Yay! Have a great day ahead all!

randomness

2009-05-17T15:14:22Z

1. Life has been as good as it can get. I may not have much of a social life as it is since i usually go straight home after work or spend most of my weekend at home but I have no complaints. Staying at home = spending no/less money = more money saved for my tentative trip to Japan!

2. Work has been good. I like my job and the work I do. Still learning the ropes, getting into the rhythm of things and refreshing my memory on areas of law i have slightly forgotten. Ending my standard probation period this month! I guess I had to experience a lot of other things first before I finally find what is right for me and I have a feeling my current job is where i'm suppose to be. . :) I'll do a review on this in a couple of months down the road heh

3. Star Trek and Angels & Demons is out in cinemas! I have yet to watch any of em' yet. Suppose to watch the latter with the siblings tho we have yet to decide on a date yet. Might be watching the former on my own i reckon. If Sa.shi decides to pull out then i'll have no kakis but its ok I am capable of watching a movie on my own (^-')v

4. Went to watch Much Ado About Nothing at Fort Canning Park. My first Shakespeare in the park and i loved it! Picnic and a play under the stars, brilliant! Now why wasn't there such a thing when i was doing Lit in secondary school? :P
My review? The play was brilliantly staged and Adrian Pang totally stole the show with his potrayal of Benedick. The lady who played Beatrice did a splendid job as well. The only gripe i had was with the audio or maybe i just need my hearing checked LOL. But they definitely could have raised the volume a lil louder coz at some parts i was straining to hear what some of the characters were saying. But overall the play was good and I'll definitely be looking forward to the next staged play in the park by SRT (^-')b

5. American Idol! Adam and Kris are the final two! Honestly I had expected an Adam and Danny showdown but i guess Kris secured a place in the final with his rendition of 'Heartless'. What he did with the song was brilliant. Danny did equally well during the final 3 tho Paula's choice didn't help him much. She should known that fast 'dancy' songs could only hurt him right? tsk. Danny's departure was bittersweet and when he sang his song choice again at the end of the show you could just hear the emotions that he put into it. Looking forward to AI finals, tho i reckon Adam would win. Kris has his moments but Adam is the constant performer who kills it everytime.

6. So have you watched The Quiz Show 2 yet? (if you don't know what i'm talking about you can skip this part lol)
Honestly the only reason i started watchin it is because of Sho. Although some might say that the way he hosts the quiz show in the drama might be slightly similar to his regular hosting in Arashi's variety shows but I must say when his drama character goes into his serious mode where he gives a certain 'evil' look and usually says "I know everything about you" it kinda sends a shiver down my spine atashi suki! LOLOL

7. Grey's Anatomy season finale was a shocker. I'm already looking forward to the new season. What will happen to Izzie and George?!?! Then there's Supernatural too, stupidstupid Sam. He should have listened to Dean now see what he's done. :P

8. My ipod is running out of memory! idk^*#* Now i have a headache of what songs/albums that i need to delete from my ipod nano. le sigh.

9. in other news, darling Lili has given birth to a healthy baby girl!
Ain't she a cutie :)

10. Singapore public transport still has more room for improvement. Their service was only better during the week they got fined but after that its back to square one. Late and overcrowded buses during peak hours. and please its not only the 'official' buses that was mentioned in the report that is overcrowded, they should take a look at feeder service buses bluek. Then there's also the thing with the 'new' buses. I almost twisted my arm countless times due to the absurd jerking and hard breaking. Almost lost my balance and fell a couple of times, I almost fell and sat on a guy hokay! embarassing much? Injury suit waiting to happen methinks.

11. Missing darling melly and dee! hope you guys are doing well in school!

Long weekend!

2009-04-11T14:34:28Z

So how is everyone enjoying their long Easter holiday weekend? Well for the most part of mine i'm busy slacking at home watching online videos and doing personal online research, i'll let you know what i'm researching on it a bit. I love research don't you LOL!
ok quick random updates!

1 - Oasis' concert at the Indoor Stadium last Sunday was a blast, let's just say it was a day to remember. It was one hell of an experience, especially when i thought i almost died LOL! Never am i going to stand in the first few rows of a free standing crowd ever again. Rowdy concert goers pushing you left right and center, at one point I thought I was going to fall and be trampled by strangers. Heck the view from the back is still good especially when I'm tall so all is goood (^-^)b

2 - Lately I have had a handful of friends who went or is planning to go to Japan for holiday/work/school trip and every time I get a lil bit jealous because I really wanna go too!! So I have decided for my 25th Birthday in November this year I am going to do my very own budget trip to Tokyo, Japan! Wooot! I think I deserve a trip after everything that i've been through these past few months. Budget is gonna be tight, I found a hostel i'm considering and I like planning and doing research for a trip, Its now or never baby, life is too short to live in regret! lol
Besides the usual places in Tokyo that I want to go to like Shibuya, Harujuku, Akihabara, etc, I'm thinking of going to Aiba's family restaurant in Chiba. I could have my birthday lunch/dinner there, perhaps aye? And I'm looking for a travel buddy if anyone is interested *grinz*
If not a solo trip is okay with me too, bring on the adventure! Another alternative is if there is anyone who is already in Tokyo would want to meet up or show me around that will be awesome too!

Wee~ i'm damn excited for this trip! I'm still doing my reearch and planning out the budget and itinerary and i'm keeping my fingers crossed that everything will work out smoothly. I'll update my progress on this trip as and when there is progress (^-^)v

3 - I think i realised something this week, whenever I'm in need of a stress reliever the Arashi boys never fails to make me laugh, especially Aiba. Was looking back on a meme I did on facebook and there was a question on who makes me laugh and my answer was Aiba. The dude really cracks me up with his baka-ness and is it just me or is he getting better looking. Maybe he has always looked like that but i've never noticed? Ironically he was the first member i noticed when I was watching an older Arashi PV a couple years back and they were simply another J-pop group to me before I really got into them and thereafter all the other members started shining brighter :P

4 - Eversince the public transportation service providers have been fined early last week for lapses in their services, I must say the public buses have kinda improved during peak hours. But i have doubts that they will keep up with it coz sooner or later, the peak hour services will go back to before, never on time and you have to wait for ages for a feeder service and then the bus service providers, like routine, will get fined again and who gets affected? The public, because these public service providers will raise their fares again. I hope they prove me wrong.

5 - If you're in sg, I'm sure you've read/heard about the food poisoning episode with the geylang rojak stall. My condolences to the families who lost their loved ones. This tragedy i must say kinda reminds me of the fragility of life. One moment you are enjoying life, planning for the future, the next minute your life can just be cut short because of something you ate. A person can never predict how long or how short their life is going to be so Carpe Diem people! :)

6 - Eversince the opening of Tampines 1 at Tampines Central, mannn Tampines is even more crowded!!!! Me don't like. Its very hard navigating through eastlink mall that connects the interchange to the MRT station, i already hated it when they started having carts in the area bluek~ Well considering the Mall has just opened maybe the crowds is to be expected. Hopefully the hype of the new mall will die down eventually. Did i mention how much i hate crowds LOL

7 - Got around to watching Arashi's AAA 2008 concert and i love it! If only they had a concert here in Singapore. My favourite performance has got to be Subarashiki Sekai and Sirius.
Before i sign off i'm sharing the videos here, enjoy!

Subarashiki Sekai

Lyrics and translation

Sirius

Lyrics and translation

People.

2009-03-29T10:19:48Z

"Having people is better than having no people"
- Grey's Anatomy, Season 5 Episode 19

Ain't that the truth. I don't know how I would have gone through the past couple of months without people around me, mainly my family and friends. The support they provided was enough for me to get through every tough obstacle. When I was down during the infection & during post surgery, I always tried not to show the aftermath of pain that was a constant visitor during the night as I wouldn't want them to worry, their visits when I was in hospital was always the brightest point of my day, it always lifted up my spirits, made me forget my worries/pain and made me determined to get well faster. Then there are the student doctors and student nurses I made friends with. I loved talking with them and they visited me when they can. I was surrounded by people and it mattered. I don't know how it would have been then if I had no people around me.

"Trauma always leaves a scar
It follows us home, It changes our lives
Trauma messes everybody up but maybe that's the point
All the pain and the fear and the crap
maybe going through all that keeps us moving forward
it whats pushes us
maybe we have to get a little messed up before we can step up"
- Grey's Anatomy, ending: Season 5 Episode 19, Narration by Alex Karev

I know of friends who are going through a tough time. You may not confide in me but that is okay, you have your own demons to kill, obstacles to overcome but I know you will find a solution and come out stronger. I'll always be here if you need a friend. gambare! *hugs*

I had an awesome day with my sisters yesterday. We chose to take an alternative route to our destination, we ended up having lunch at the airport before taking the bus to the Esplanade where we spent most of our Saturday. Caught the Baybeats 2009 final round of auditions in the afternoon, had dinner at Gluttons Bay and watched an excellent performance by Rima Rasif and her band in the late evening. We kinda missed the first two bands during the Baybeats 2009 auditions but some notable mentions were performances by Audiocean, ExDee, Quasimodo, Meza Virs and Stellastory. And I have to say for a black metal band, Meza Virs is worth a listen.

The initial plan after the auditions was to go for the Earth Hour event at the Merlion Park but after dinner we decided to just stay at the Esplanade and watch the band performance at the Outdoor Theater at 8.30pm and I think that was the best decision ever. Rima Rasif and her band consisting of Amos and Roberto on guitar and the electric guitar respectively were needless to say AWESOME! She was hilarious and her laughter was infectious. She is an amazing performer and got the audience singing along to popular tunes like Rehab and Sweet Child O' Mine.

Look who secretly followed us! Rodney!

.

In other exciting news, I finally received my package from my snack partner kissophelia from we_swap_snacks

Look who's excited!

Rodney spots an old friend!

Rodney exploring the box of goodies

Rice Krispies Treats! how I miss these tasty treat

mmm Cheetos!

Animal Crackers! The box looks a little beaten up but hopefull the crackers are alright hee~

Yummy Pop Tarts!

Ring Pop! Who remembers this from their childhood?

Rodney having a conversation with his ol' friend (^-^)

Thanks for the package Scarlett, its awesome!

On a totally random note, I received a handwritten letter in the mail and I have no idea who it is from. Apparently from the contents the person knows me but the big question on my mind is, "How did he get my address?!?!?!" Meccha scary lei, especially where the letter originated from. I won't blog much about it but I just might reply just to find out who the sender is. hmmz.

countdown: 1 week to OASIS Live in Concert!!!

Happy Friday!

2009-03-20T09:20:22Z

*caution long entry ahead, you have been warned (^-^)

Today is a very slow day, not much work in the office and thus I am borreddd. I’ve finished my draft of the mitigation plea for an upcoming hearing next week and am currently waiting for the notification of my EFS document to be approved and any other work that any of the lawyers have for me.

Can’t wait for the day to end! Meeting up with 2nd sis later and we are headed to *Scape to watch live band performances for WeekendTRIP Noise Edition. Been awhile since I watched a live performance andd Quasimodo is in the line up. Remember the band I mentioned during my New Year entry? (^-^)

In my attempt to kill time I’ve been reading my past entries on LJ. Jogged quite a number of memories I’ve forgotten. This is one of the aspects of blogging that I like. It allows you to take a step back and see the person you were in the past and how far you have grown.

Oh! Btw Naz I found this entry in April 2007 mentioning our plans to go backpacking across Europe in 2010 in the comments section. Who would have thought that we would have had our winter trip 8 months down the road? But I still want to do the backpacking trip! There are loads more cities that I have yet to visit, like Venice and Paris! And you still want to experience a snowy day right? haha

I also came across the entry where Gordon from AW used to be the voice at the back of my head saying, “How your life is currently is exactly the way you want it to be.” And to this day I still agree.

I had qualms going back into legal work, afraid that I’ll mess things up, afraid that the 1 ½ years I spent pursuing my interest in Events management will go to waste. But alas the economic crises does not allow one who is also from a low income single parent family to be choosy and be idealistic. So I conceded, with Hazie’s help clinched an interview with a law firm and to sum it up the rest as they say is History. Before I started work I was freaking nervous. “ What if I screw up?” “arghhh I haven’t done law in ages what if I don’t remember anything” “ What if I’m making the biggest mistake in my life?” “What if I end up like those people who turn up for a few days of work and end up quitting??” I was full of what if questions and that was not making me any less nervous.

On the Saturday before I started work, met up with the clique in Bugis. One other reasons for the trip there besides grabbing dinner is for me to get some much needed ‘office’ clothes. Whilst wondering around aimlessly around the mall with the guys I saw a quote by Lance Armstrong: -

“Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.”

The quote kinda left an impression on me. I don’t know why but I kept telling myself whatever happens, pain is temporary and if I quit the pain will last forever. No matter how tough things get I should keep moving forward. Well that is what I’ve been doing. It has been two weeks and what do you know I am actually currently enjoying my job.I don’t feel as tired after work as I used to during my previous job. When I want to de-stress I look forward to either going home and spend time with my siblings who never fails to make me laugh and forget my ‘stress’ or meet up with friends for an impromptu cup of Joe or dinner. Even with my current lack of finances since I’m meccha broke for the month till my pay comes in, I am happy. I have a job, I have an awesome family and I have awesome friends. What else does a girl need? I am a simple girl with simple needs (^-')v

Darling Aida contacted me this morning. She is meccha stress. Her wedding is in less than 6 months and she is not sure of what is entirely going on in terms of the wedding details. All she sees is loads of moolahs flying away from her. How can one not know the going ons of her own wedding? Tsktsk LOL.

So tomorrow I volunteered to come over to her abode and help get things sorted. What are best buds for kan. Speaking of which I still have no idea what I’m suppose to wear on her wedding day since me together with the ‘mak andam’ is supposed to follow the bride and groom to and from their respective homes.

Despite being malay, I am a novice when it comes to malay weddings. Truth be told I never understood the romance in void deck weddings heh and please don’t say because its cheap. I think that it is a load of BS. The quotes that I’ve seen and heard in regards to malay void deck weddings, I think if the bride and groom’s family combine forces a.k.a moolahs they can do it wherever they want.

The usual reason that I get for not doing so? The proud parents of the respective bride and groom want to host their own celebration under the void deck. …klah what ever rocks their boats lol. And do you really need at least more than 3 changes of outfits?? Please lah siapa nak tengokkkk (who wants to seeee). And isn’t it blardy hot at the void deck despite even attempting to install temporary fans? Imagine wearing your best ‘baju kurung’ and whatnots and sweat running down your back and feeling that you’re almost melting like an ice-cream under the hot sun.

If it were ever up to me, this is if I ever in the very far far future find someone who is able to convince me to tie the knot with; I’d have a nice intimate affair somewhere nice with CLOSE friends and family. No need to invite all the countless relatives you’ve never known existed or see once in a very blue moon or acquaintances who only find you when they need something.

Oh and there’s this quote by Jim Morrison that I stumbled upon: -

“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”

I think I have to agree with the above and I am no longer afraid of pain. No longer afraid of feeling, no longer afraid of things that have yet to happen. Nervous perhaps, but not so much of being afraid. I’ve experienced both physical and emotional pain and hey I’m still here alive and kicking, and with everything that I’ve been through I’m perfectly happy and contented with my life. Things happen for a reason right? Tho I occasionally still get the pangs of wanting to do more things like further my studies, travel around the world, meet a new guy, but I realise that I am in no hurry. When the opportunity comes it will come. Knowledge will still be there when I have the means and the opportunity to pursue it, countries and cities will be just where they are when I have the means to fly abroad, the right guy will come along when I least expect it.

C’est la vie

Mid week ramblings

2009-03-18T15:57:53Z

Its mid week already! Can you believe it? Time flies by so fast these days.

Work has been so far so good. I'm learning a lot and doing work for various cases under different areas of law. I hate to say this or maybe i'm saying this too early but I am somehow or rather enjoying what I do. I'll let you know again if I feel the same way after a month LOL

I had two different hospital appointments yesterday and had 4 hours to kill in between. Totally spacedout that naz might have classes on that day, but thank god for facebook! She texted me and since both of us had time to kill, me between appointments and she between classes, I went over to NUS Business School to look for her and grab some lunch. Well I found myself at Biz 2 and had to climb the flight of stairs which was facing the bus stop and daym that almost killed me. Goes to show how unfit I am. I reckon you can get two days worth of exercise just climbing stairs in the school, to think I actually complained on having to climb the staircase at ITE East (Bishan) campus and the occasional time when one is late for classes in TP and there is no point waiting for the lift haha

American Idol performance today!
Country week, not exactly my favourite theme on idol but I think most of the contestants did okay.
And I have to say this, Anoop is back baby! One of my favourite performances this week. And well the most amusing performance was Adam's. I'm sure most people went (o-O)" during his performance LOL!

My picks for this week:
Top 3 - Anoop, Matt, Allison
Bottom 3 - Micheal, Kris, Alexis/Adam ( i couldn't decide LOL)

well alritey then i should sign off now, my sis is already grumbling that she wants to use her laptop LOL
ah well i need to go to sleep anyways (^-^)v
till my next update, oyasumi!

Sunday Morning

2009-03-15T03:58:02Z

Good Sunday Morning medarlings!
I have been quite busy this week as I've just started on my new job! Thus the lack of updates *grinz*

Well i'm back to work in an office and in the legal line to boot. Ah well can't be fussy in this bad economy but surprisingly so far I kinda enjoy the work. Tho my knowledge of legal processes etc are a bit on the rusty side I'm re-learning and refreshing my memory as I go along, plus the work in the office is not concentrated to one area of law which is awesome, so i don't get bored easily LOL. It ranges from criminal cases to civil cases I currently kinda like support all the lawyers who has anything for me to do, from legal research to drafting of letters. The pace is still quite okay as i'm still new, tho i expect it to pick up and i hope i can handle it when it comes to crunch time. *fingers crossed*

I am still getting used to having to waking up early as compared to how i usually have been waking up at noon for the past few months. LOL I now walk to Tampines MRT station from home coz waiting for the bus service to the interchange is such a biatch and when the bus comes its usually full. I figured it'll be a lot faster if i walked, plus i get some morning exercise at the same time!

Falling sick midway through the first week of work is very unpleasent. I had sore throat, running nose, non-stop sneezing and an oncoming feeling of fever. I highly suspect that my system is somewhat sensitive to dust thus the above symptoms coz now over the weekend the awful feeling i have been having has subsided. By Friday I was fed up with the sneezing and running noze in the office that I found some wet wipes in my desk drawer and proceeded to wipe the surfaces of my surrounding work area. I think i'm going to do that everyday before I start work.haha

And what better thing could have cheered me up after a long week of work than Arashi's 2009-2010 Calendar!!!!!
Yes I've finally collected it from Kino after procrastinating. Well also because I was waiting for the Spring discount promotion for members to take effect haha! 20% discount!! woot! So i ended up having paid less than $40 for the calendar wheeeeee~

Aiba! -my favourite solo photo of the bunch

hee~ i love this group photo (^-^)

Oh and an exciting discovery that i just had to blog about! Met up with T.ania, MX & Ling.na on Saturday at Northpoint for Dinner and we found ourselves at the new wing of the mall after walking aimlessly in search of a place to eat. And we came across Ishi Mura, a japanese themed foodcourt! wahhhh We decided to try it out and i LOVE the place! They should have one in Tampines and one in City Hall so I can patronize it everyday! (^-^)v

Me and T.ania decided to try the ebi okonomiyaki and since I was hungry I wanted to try the omelette rice as well. The okonomiyaki looks kinda different to me. I wonder if Singapore has those japanese okonomiyaki restaurants where you can cook your own like those they have in Japan. I would love to try that! Maybe if i visit Japan one day hehe
My salmon omelette rice was yummy! The omelette was all fluffy just the way I like it and the sauce was not 'jelak', it was sure a whole lot better than the local pattaya rice. yumm!

Salmon Omelette Rice!

Fluffy omelette!

Ebi Okonomiyaki

MX ordered the curry rice. The curry was a tad sweet. I think I still prefer the good ol' fashion indian curry

Iktadakimasu!

Arashi's brand new single, Believe, is my current earworm! It constantly plays in my head all day and it helps that its my current favourite song! I listen to it everyday. I also watch their PV on my ipod when i'm on the train on the way home I kinda love it because the song is kinda like a motivational song too if you listen to their lyrics. wheee~
see: Lyrics & translation (credit to iruy )

you can watch the official PV here

okay back to watchin the latest episode of Mei-chan no Shitsuji!
have a good one!

p.s. - T.ania T.ay! Get well soon!!! Don't strain your foot too much!! (^-^)

add title here (^-^)v

2009-03-01T18:32:51Z

Hello me darlings,
I just came back from my late night run. Yes i finally got off my butt and went to the park behind my house for a run. 3 rounds around the park aint that bad me thinks altho i did brisk walk most of the way since my stamina aint there yet LOL It was refreshing nevertheless since i was feeling restless beforehand. The restlessness has somewhat become a routine during boring eventless weekends =P The weather was perfect since it was raining heavily in the late afternoon/evening and the air was still cool and the stars were out with no clouds in sight. It was quite lovely tho i wish there was someone there with me to point out the different constellations in the sky. The only one i know is the Orion, since its the most prominent lol

The past week has been dreary except for the random heavy rain <3, Hugh Jackman's hosting at the Oscars, American Idol group 2 performance and the hilarious programme which is Pesta Perdana 10 on Suria.
Anddd before i forget, during the course of the week two law ex-coursemates of mine got MARRIED!!!! say what!? So young and married. Why the rush? But whatever makes them happy aye? My best wishes to them (^-^)b

Speaking of which did I mention that i received a letter from the government to join their 'matchmaking' services, what do they call it.. the SDU? ROFL
I know they want singles to hook up, get married and have babies to boost the country's birthrate. The irony of it all? I cannot have children unless i want to risk my life in doing so wahahahhahahaha

Oh and other than that i had a job interview which i still have no idea of its outcome tho i'm not really worried if i don't get the job because my heart is uneasy and my gut tells me that i would be taking a step back should i get it. Ah well. I'll leave it up to the powers that be :)

oh yes American Idol group 2. Lovelovelove Allison Iraheta. When i heard she was going to sing 'Alone' by Heart, I thought omg she was going to mess it up like previous contestants who had sang that song. The only singer that I've heard sing it who had done the song justice was Carrie Underwood. But surprisesurpirse, that Allison girl can sing. She made me sit up and gave me slight goosebumps even tho she went slightly off tune at certain parts i think mostly due to nerves. Altho i can't really remember her personality, she is definitely one of the few to watch in the competition. The other two, Kris Allen and Adam Lambert who got in, well no surprises there, i expected them to go through after watching the group perform but I'm still not sure of them yet. Adam's performance of 'Satisfaction' was only okay for me, a bit pitchy so we'll see what he does in the Top 12 and honestly i can't remember Kris Allen's performance that much lol. I do hope that for the wild card round they bring back Nick Mitchell (Norman Gentle LOL) and Megan Corkrey back. Norman Gentle performance was just awesome. The most entertaining idol contestant ever.

Pesta Perdana 10. Against my better judgement I actually watched it because I had nothing better to do since i was waiting for Survivor to start on Channel 5 and my sister wanted to watch it. Well 3/4 of the shows and artists that were nominated, except for the veterans, lets just say I have no freaking clue what or who they are since I don't watch Suria. The only time i watch Suria is when someone in the family happens to change the channel and we spot something hilarious. Which brings me to Pesta Perdana 10. It was the most hilarious award show that I've ever watched only because of how bad it was. The dead air time, the lapse in organization, cues and awkwardness on stage. Since it's in its 10th year running, I would have expected that the show will be a lot better and smoother.

The hosting was Bad, coming from Aaron Aziz i'm not surprised. Aaron please leave the hosting to people who can actually host. And at this day and age, can't Suria afford a tele-prompter? Its awkward to see presenters/hosts holding cards and reading from them of which half of the time their eyes are on the cards. This does not only apply to Pesta Perdana but almost all Suria 'Live' studio shows. Or they can always do it like what MTV TRL used to do, hold huge cue cards near the camera so the host can read off it and still look at the camera. LOL

Pesta Perdana 9 won an award during the show, not sure how well it was last year since I didnt watch it but if Pesta Perdana 10 wins it next year, i swear the awards are rigged lol.

ah well enough rambling, my dose of current US TV shows are on hold since most of them are on a 3 week break. ZOMG. I have no idea why it is that long but oh well I can always catch up on my manga/animes which I have not been keeping up to date on. LOL

On a side note, i miss my friends. Everyone is busy and some are not even in SG. For those who are, let's meet up soon okay. Oh and i'm looking at photos my sister just posted up (she went to JB with her friends), it's making me crave for seafood!!!! Chilli crab, butter prawns, calamari... ahhhhh my mouth is watering just thinking of it. I'm still waiting for the JB seafood eating trip to actually materailze!!!! hmmm speaking of which i need to renew my passport LOL

oh and ARASHI's 2009/2010 calander is OUTT!! YAY! I have yet to collect mine at Kino but i am patient. I can always look at photos posted up by over zealous fans on LJ comms haha

all this random talk has made me hungry. Gonna go make me some instant noodles now.
Have a good week folks!

2009 Oscars - Opening

2009-02-26T00:23:19Z

Okay this is a delayed post. Did you guys catch the Academy Awards on Monday? I think out of all the hosting that has been done previously Hugh Jackman is my favourite! I love love his hosting especially the opening number he did! Oh and Anne Hathaway was a darling. If you missed it here is a video on You Tube. Enjoy!

Mitral Valve Replacement Surgery

2009-02-22T16:15:53Z

So i was random you-tubing and i found this video.
More or less a picture of what i went through for my surgery.
Thought i'd share this for the curious ones (^-^)

random

2009-02-20T10:07:41Z

Can you believe it? Its end of the week already, which reminds me I need to go to the Library to return my books and get new ones or i'll be bored during the weekend heh

First 3 contestants for American Idol's Top 12 has been decided. yay Danny & Micheal got in! But kinda dissapointed that Anoop wasn't able to go through. Hopefully he'll be in the wildcard round.

Being bored as I currently am, doing another meme i got from somewhere lol

YOUR BOY SIDE:
[x] you love hoodies
[x] you love jeans
[x] dogs are better than cats
[] it's hilarious when people get hurt
[x] shopping is torture
[] sad movies suck
[] you play XBOX 360/PS2
[x] you played with Hot Wheels as a little kid
[] at some point in life you wanted to be a firefighter
[] you owned a DS, PS2, or Sega
[x] you used to be obsessed with Power Rangers
[] you watch sports on TV
[] you go to your dad for advice
[] you own like a trillion baseball hats
[] you used to/collect footy collector cards
[] baggy sweatpants are cool to wear
[] it's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people
[x] green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors
[x] you love to go crazy and not care what other people think
[x] sports are fun
[x] you talk with food in your mouth
[] you sleep at night with your socks on
[x] you have fished at least once

Total = 11

YOUR GIRL SIDE:
[] you love to shop
[x] you wear eyeliner
[] you wear the color pink
[] you go to your mum for advice
[] you consider cheerleading a sport
[] you wear very little black
[] you hate wearing the color black
[] you like going to the mall
[] you cried watching walk to remember
[] skirts are a part of your wardrobe
[] shopping is one of your favorite hobbies
[] you take around one hour to shower
[] you are/were in gymnastics/tumbling
[x] you smile a lot more than you should
[] you have more than 10 pairs of shoes
[x] you care about what you look like
[] you always/sometimes wear dresses
[] you like wearing body spray
[] you like high heel shoes
[] you used to play with dolls as a kid
[] you like putting makeup on others
[] pink is one of your favorite colors
[] you laugh more than you breathe
[x] you absolutely love chocolate

Total = 4.

Now you know why i'm single. I'm more boyish than i need to be LOL

Somehow i feel like going for a run now. hmmm maybe later in the evening or i could cycle coz i'm not sure whether i should be running as of yet lol. First should go grab some dinner since i havent eaten anything the whole day. Instant noodles here i come (^-^)v

dum di dum dum

2009-02-18T16:34:34Z

I have not been feeling well these past few days. Stuffy runny nose, throbbing headaches and my body feels all wierd. argh. I haven't been able to do much lately, it's been very hard to focus. Hopefully the kink i'm in will pass by soon.

I've been watching American Idol today and needless to say most of the performances was boring with a captial 'B'. I think the most bearable of the performances was Danny's and Tatiana was surprisingly good. She really toned down alot and i don't get why the judges were trying to coax that annoying laugh we saw in the past few episodes out of her. Very ala high school. Tsk. Anyways I'd say both Tatiana and Danny are front runners for the group. Third spot is a toss up between Nick and Anoop methinks, i could be wrong tho. One never know what the american audience are thinking.

On to randomness to distract myself from my stuffy nose & throbbing headache =P

music meme
1. Reply to this post and I'll assign you a letter.
2. List (and upload, if you feel like it) 5 songs that start with that letter.
3. Post them to your journal with these instructions.

lyricalidol gave me the letter 'L'
(p.s. - click song title to download song)

1) Listen - Beyonce
I'm not much a die hard fan of Beyonce since i only like a handful of her songs, however i really love this song that she wrote and sang for Dreamgirls.
In my opinion a very inspiring song (^-^)

2) Life - Arashi
One of my favourite songs from their album 'TIME'.
(Lyrics & translation)

3) Leave out all the rest - Linkin Park
The angsty side of me love Linkin Park and this is a song from their album 'Minutes to Midnight'

4) L' Ultima Notte - Josh Groban
Admittedly Josh Groban is my favourite singer ever. His voice and the songs he sings makes my headache go away.
This is a very beautiful song from his album 'Awake'. I believe it is in italian and he sings it with much conviction tho the lyrics are a tad sad. Kinda like a breaking up song but still beautiful and powerful at the same time.
(Lyrics & translation)

5) Loop - Sakamoto Maaya
One of my favourite anime related songs. It's one of the ending songs for the anime, Tsubasa River Chronicles.
(Lyrics & translation)

Honestly i had more songs but these are my top 5 so that'll do i guess LOL

Friday the 13th ramblings

2009-02-13T16:44:33Z

Happy friday the 13th! LOL

Who can forget about tomorrow? With constant reminders via email, FB, radio, TV... tsk.
V-day is damn over-rated. Not that i'm being sour becoz i'm single but seriously, what is so special about a day where every other couple 'celebrates' it at the same time? Very the not romantic methinks. wahahaha

Anyhooo, Its almost mid february now and i am so nowhere near where I thought I'd be at my age. Who would have thought I'd had the darnest luck? Falling ill, surgery, recovery, economic crisis all bundled up in around the same time line and now me being unable to find a job after countless job applicatons. Unfortunately with this darn bout of bad luck i'm in becoming a pessimist. Somehow i always get the feeling that whenever recruiters see my resume they will just pass it because i'm either 1)malay 2)am not bilingual because i don't speak mandarin/dialect or 3)they don't like my face hmmrph as racist as it might sound but heck it happens right here in sg, equality my foot.

kwangkwang okok enough of me being pessimistic it will get me nowhere especially living in sg.

Do you guys watch the latest season of American Idol? Damn that Tatiana girl is freakin annoying. Anyways i already have my favourites but i'd have to watch them perform during the Top 36 rounds first like how David Cook made me sit up and notice when he performed 'Hello'.
Speaking of which one of the contestants, Michael Sarver, I swear kinda looks like Nick Carter's older brother or relative. you think?

I think he, I mean Michael, has a nice singing voice. Who knows he might be the dark horse? Hopefully he does well in the Top 36 and manage to get in to Top 12. Would be interesting to watch. =)

Alritey then, refering to my previous post, as promised, photos!

requested by mklia

1. My wall

2. My oldest possession

This teddy bear was given to me by my aunt when i was in the hospital for my first surgery in 1998. His name is Nick and he has also been with me throughout my days in the children orphanage back then ;)
oh and the cap he's wearing is new and mine, he's just wearing it to look cool LOL

requested by montanasky

My favourite corner/scenery
I couldn't decide one so i'll post one that i took locally and one i took overseas.

This was taken in 2002/2003 i think. Was on my out from school (ITE Bishan) and the lighting was perfect :)

This was taken on my way to the college town in Cambridge, UK

requested by orangerobots

My room
Ok the thing is I share the same room with my sisters so I don't think they appreciate me taking photos of the room, therefore I took photos of my corner of the room lol. A bit messy i know but I like it coz its cozy hehe

Unfortunately no 'fangirl' stuff lol. The closest thing to that is my Il Divo 2007 Calendar that Ta.nia got me for my birthday in 2006. lol

requested by daramji

What's in my bag?

The bag that i usually lug around. My mum complains its too big and that i shouldn't be carrying heavy stuff coz of my recent surgery. lol

Stuff that is usually in my bag: (clockwise from top left hand corner)
My aviator shades, reading glasses, house keys, tic tac extra strong mints, lip balm/gloss, face blotting powder, canon ixus 75 camera, leather-bound notebook with pen, ipod nano (3rd gen), Samsung i600 smartphone, cardholder & wallet.

requested by countess_dee

Photo of herself.
Babe you have so many photos of yourself need me to post somemore rubbish lol
finefine here is one of my favourite old photo of you i took in 2007 i think ehehehe

Photo request

2009-02-08T13:00:10Z

Snagged this meme from mklia
Since I like to take photos why not aye? lol

Ask me to take pictures of any aspects of my life that you're interested in or curious about. It can be anything from my favorite shirt to my cellphone. Leave your requests as a comment to this entry, and I'll snap the pictures and post them up in my next post. (^-^)

essence_de_moi @ 2009-01-30T21:03:00

2009-01-30T13:29:45Z

Ran a few personal errands today and i decided to walk to Tampines Central from home since the weather was nice and windy plus i wanted to save on transport. To and from the bus interchange costs about $1.50. The horror! I can buy a cup of bubble tea for that amount lolz I enjoyed my walk and i got my dose of exercise but now i have a blister on one of my toes. Reason why i don't like to wear slippers XP I have now learnt my lesson. I shall now only wear slippers if i'm only walking a minimal distance hehe

I'm still currently unemployed. This is sucky. I need a jobbbbbb. Any lobangs? lol
I need to be more pro-active at this job search and try a different strategy.

Friday evening and i'm already borreddd.
Blog hopped and found this. Well its something to do and my new LJ friends can get to know me a lil' better ;)

THE RULES!
bold the statements that are true to you
italicise the statements that you WISH are true
leave the fibs alone

I miss somebody right now.
I don’t watch TV these days.
I own lots of books.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I’ve tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I’m TOTALLY smart.
I’ve broken someone’s bones.
I’m paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really, really fast.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have worn fake/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D
I like the way I look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends.
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
I enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don’t hate anyone. I dislike them.
I’m a pretty good dancer.
I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I’ve rejected someone before.
I have no idea what i want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
I’m not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.
I own the “SouthPark” movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and i like it.
I have dated a close friend's ex.
I am happy at this moment!!
I’m obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
I can work on a car.
I love my job.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I’m proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at McDonald’s restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I fall for the worst people.
I adore bright colours.
I can’t live without black eyeliner.
I don’t know why the hell i just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I’ve ever written in
I can’t stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can’t stand at LEAST one person that i work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
I’m an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy.
I am an adrenaline junkie..

Mid week ramblings

2009-01-28T08:59:14Z

I swear my family house is falling apart. We've been living in the same place for almost 21 years now and alot of things are beginning to break down.
This is the umpteenth time the kitchen lights has given up on working, the ceiling fan in the living room has been changed 3 times and its making wierd noises now and then, my bedroom ceiling fan has gone bust so i have to buy a standing fan and put in my already crowded room. The other kitchen light that lights up the other corner of the kitchen has also gone bust. If we attempt to turn it on the whole house blacks out and now the television sometimes goes on strike and doesn't turn on.

I think for an average large Singaporean HDB household family we have been living in the same house the longest. I realised that most of our surrounding neighbours, including the flat directly opposite our block has changed. I think if our HDB flats were not build to last i think my home will have loads more problems. Aside from that there are countless changes to the neighbourhood. I still don't like the condominium that they are building diagonally adjacent to my flat. Such an eyesore =P I very much prefer the open field that was there. Then there's the construction works being done to 'upgrade' the neighbourhood. They tore apart the badminton court, trees and open space to build a vegetable/flower garden and a roofed venue thingymagic whatever they call it i forgot lol. wtf. Now who do you reckon is going to take care of this garden? And the purpose of this small garden and enclosed space is for what actually? *rolls eyes*

On a much happier note, the boots i ordered online is here! yay! I know I know i should stop spending, which i've already done. Honest! The boots was ordered last week and it was on discount =P Its not like i can get my shoe size here in sg. Now i have to think of outfits i can wear it with. wheee

.

My mum was rolling her eyes when she saw my new boots. Another item in my shoes collection she said lol. Which is kinda true. I don't wear 80% of the shoes i own. Its like retail-therapy. I like buying shoes but i usually wear my sandals and sneakers as they are much more comfortable for me (^-^)v

Whenever i see girls wearing high heel shoes, especiallly the stilettos type, i'd just look at them in awe. I can never wear such shoes, firstly because i believe it was originally invented for torture and secondly i can never balance myself in those shoes. Anyways i'm already tall as it is, no need for added height aye? or i'll scare all the boys away hahahaha Anyways, gorgeously made shoes are always nice to look at and it also can complete an outfit. Which is why my outfits are usually casual since most of the time i wear casual shoes/sandals ahahahahahahaha I like being comfortable cannot meh =P Sometimes when i find myself having to wear heels, i'd tell myself 'no pain, no gain' but most of the time life is too short to torture yourself, so as long as i keep to my own style and be as comfortable as i want to be then carpe diem! lol

oh well, i have more things to ramble on but i need to get ready to meet my sis
till then!